The guys would look at me and say things like, "Why don't you take your top off?"
My response, "Because my father hugged me as a child."
Which by the way isn't true but I never felt the need to get naked in front of 150 men on a golf course. For $15 an hour.
I left the tournament about half way through. Couldn't take it.
Last night I went to dinner with Landon. Sweet 25 year old Landon. It was work related. (Yeah right)We were going to a new wine bar that just opened up.
Before our food arrived Landon asked me what I want in a husband. Are you serious? Boy? You are going to ask me that.
All I could say is when I was in my twenties I thought I had it all figured out. But now all my standards have changed. Not lowered. Just changed.
I want a good guy. Not a HOT guy. Not a guy who makes a shit load of money. All though hot and rich would be nice :-) But a guy who is interested in being married and making a marriage work. Even when it gets hard. I've had too many guys run for the hills when the first sign of trouble hit. Only to come running back later.
I don't know what Landon's deal is. He kept calling it a date. I told him it wasn't a date when I paid (on my corporate expense) and we were visiting accounts we sell to. Oh and there was no making out neither!!
Doesn't sound like a date to me.
But it was nice. He is sweet.
On my drive home I was feeling a bit lonely. I text messaged TDW. It was early morning in France. He's been calling lately. I can't figure out if I miss him. Or the idea. Or the sex.
But I do know I'm wasting my time. He will never change.
I aked him to join me this year at my company summer budget meetings. They are in AZ and TDW will be in town that weekend. I can't face Oakdale with his new girlfriend. And the rest of the men in my company asking about my lovelife. TDW will play a part. I talked to him about it. He's down.
Oh well...
I leave for Vegas tomorrow. Last year when I went I got really fucked up. Got drugged and woke up next to a black couple. I was FULLY CLOTHED and nothing happened. But it was still scary. I hate Vegas.
But Linz will be there and so will a ton of others I work with in the industry.
Again... what am I complaining about. Having to party all weekend on the company dime? Oh, how rough.
And this is my life...